I'm not actually here, and I'm not actually writing this blog. I'm on holiday in a cottage in the North East of this country, with no internet access and no real motive to seek out an internet cafe. This blog is an imposter and a fraud.
The fact is, for completely childish reasons, I found myself attracted to the idea of writing a blog whilst not actually being here/there. And this is easily enough done by playing with the Timestamp; the blog then lurks in cyberspace until it's scheduled to appear.
If this were a detective novel, this could be my alibi. I couldn't have possibly been in the Billiard Room wielding the candlestick with such deadly effect, because my vast (!) internet community of blog-readers were sitting at their screens reading when these very words appeared. This means I effectively have carte blanche to commit a heinous murder at precisely 21.00 on Wednesday 22nd August.
Beware....
August 24th, 2007 at 11:34 am
The police have been informed, Phil.
You committed Error 466: When an evil bad guy, never, ever tell people how clever you are, and spill the beans. Tsk!
Although, actually, the time-stamp is still August 21st at precisely 21.00. You've been rumbled!
(Sorry for that slightly strange post there. I need coffee.)
~Chris
The Book Swede
August 25th, 2007 at 11:39 pm
Damn, I committed the cardinal supervillain crime of 'monologuing'.
And another thing...
August 29th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
You see, I believed that the blog was maintained by that scary looking omniscient Palmer-head that floats constantly over to the right there, and that the real Captain Philip Palmer Esq. was adventuring across the world.
Rousing young maidens from their virginity. Stealing sacred relics. Not paying taxes.
Stuff like that.
I am now terribly disappointed to find that there is no floating Palmer-head and no saucy adventuring, and that the blog is maintained by a murderous scoundrel of supreme villainy.
Oh, hang on. I quite like that one on reflection.
Sure, there's no floating Palmer-head, but tell me, do you have an evil costume?